In a recent article for the Catholic Herald of London, Eve Tushnet argues that the Church has a stark choice. Either she must accept out-and-proud gay men and women as they are or, failing that, she must risk losing them to apostasy or suicide.
Ms. Tushnet asserts that any efforts to help men to deal with unwanted sexual thoughts, attractions, and behaviors are doomed not only to failure but to causing harm. She says, “The alternative to conversion therapy is not a better psychiatric theory or a more traditional prayer regime. The alternative is offering gay people a Catholic future that does not depend on becoming straight.”
In this way, Ms. Tushnet says the Church must support “gay Catholics who come out.” She then invokes the friendship of David and Jonathan as models for gay Catholics. (Gays have a habit of claiming historical figures for their cause.) Underscoring the tendency of gays to misunderstand the institution, Tushnet says such a friendship for gays can be “as beautiful and committed as marriage.”
One of the more preposterous claims made by Ms. Tushnet is that while “gay” and “straight” are social constructs, they are “only one way of organizing our kaleidoscopic array of longings.” A “kaleidoscopic array of longings” points to the nutty Kinseyian notion that human sexuality is a continuum from exclusively homosexual to exclusively heterosexual and all stops in between. With the introduction of transgenderism, the continuum has grown exponentially—or, as Tushnet might say, kaleidoscopically. But it should be pointed out that the man-woman bond is not a social construct—unlike “being gay.”
Another article published by the Herald on the same day takes a different view of therapy for unwanted sexual thoughts, attractions, and behaviors. Father Phillip Bochanski, executive director of Courage, an approved Catholic apostolate to those with same-sex attraction, told the Herald he was fine with legitimate authority cracking down on quacks causing harm. But he is rightly fearful that the various bans on “conversion therapy” will inhibit the Church from speaking “clearly about the perennial teachings of the Gospel.”
Yet this is precisely what the Sexual Revolutionaries desire. A bedrock principle of the modern Left is that sexual orientation is innate and immutable, created by God—or Goddess, if you prefer—and can never be changed. There is a war on talk therapy for that reason: it assumes that sexual attraction is something less immutable than the color of one’s eyes. It has been banned in many states and foreign countries, and there is talk of a ban coming from the United Nations.
Unfortunately, those on the saner side of human sexuality have adopted the phrase “sexual orientation” and “sexual orientation change.” It has given a great advantage to the Sexual Revolutionaries. After all, the Church teaches there is only one sexual orientation: man for woman and woman for man. So, properly understood, there is no change in sexual orientation: only in the feelings of disordered lust experienced by the patient. Conversion therapy helps in dealing with the underlying causes for these unwanted thoughts, attractions, and behaviors. This help can only ever be voluntary and practiced by those professionally trained in talk therapy.
I do not doubt that some harm has come to those who have gone to quacks. But we must also consider the right of individuals to seek help in removing temptations to sin. This is the bedrock of talk therapy. As it is now, such talk therapy is banned in many states.
Eve Tushnet has been part of a loose grouping of writers I dubbed the “New Homophiles” in these pages seven years ago. They are self-described faithful Catholics who live by the teachings of the Church but are proudly and openly homosexual. They believe they have unique gifts that others do not have, and that these gifts must be recognized and accepted by the Church. (This notion of “unique gifts” possessed by those who experience same-sex attraction was actually included in an early draft at the family synod in the Vatican several years ago.)
These writers gathered around a blog called Spiritual Friendship, which now seems largely defunct. At least one of these writers appears to have backslid into an active homosexual life, something we warned about when same-sex friendship is treated like marriage, as Ms. Tushnet would have it.
The New Homophiles were eclipsed with the rise of Father James Martin and his approval of homosexual marriage—and, by implication, same-sex genital activity. Father Martin tends to suck all the oxygen out of the room when this issue is debated.
While Ms. Tushnet and others like her are more sensible on this issue than Father Martin, they are also wrong. Same-sex thoughts, attractions, and behaviors can be changed. Even gay scholars like Linda Diamond have shown that homosexuality—especially among women—is remarkably changeable. By arguing that such change is not possible, Ms. Tushnet does a kind of violence to the lived experience of thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands, of men and women who have left that lifestyle. They have sought to live truly in accordance with the teachings of the Church and who have not insisted that the Church change her teachings.
The great psychiatrist, Dr. Paul McHugh—now much maligned by the Sexual Revolutionaries for closing down the sex change unit at Johns Hopkins University—once described homosexual behavior as a bad habit. The Church teaches that bad habits can be broken. The Church properly accepts all who may have bad habits. She welcomes you and me. Bad habits that are also sinful find relief in prayer and confession. What the Church may never do is accept bad habits as an acceptable norm.
The above comes from a Sept. 11 story by Austin Ruse in Crisis Magazine.
Jesus lost people when He proclaimed the teaching of His Body and Blood, and didn’t bat an eye. The Left’s cult of free-range fornication defies God’s laws, in whatever forms it takes. They are the losers, not God and not His Church.
Two excellent resources for Catholics struggling with same-sex attraction (or bisexuality) and their family and friends are Courage (and EnCourage for family members) at https://couragerc.org and Eden Invitation at https://www.edeninvitation.com.
Love and truth go together (see Ephesians 4:15). Speak the truth, yet lead with love.
Courage is not a good source. It is based on the idea that homosexuality is an addiction, and that is just not in keeping with the facts. Courages encourages shame and hiding: It’s beetings are not published. It’s more like a secret society than a ministry.
That’s simply not true. I encourage readers to check out both the Courage and Eden Invitation websites, rather than rely on an anonymous critic. I’ve attended EnCourage meetings myself and if you have family or friends struggling with SSA, I encourage you to do the same. Like AA, they do value confidentiality. But, some Courage members have made their stories public, check out https://everlastinghills.org/movie/ if you’d like to see some Courage members share their stories. And, many stories are on the Eden Invitation website. There you’ll find brothers and sisters who have been freed from shame (and more) by living their true identities as sons or daughters of God in conformity with the teachings of Christ and His Church. Don’t take my word for it, check them out yourself.
Not so. Have been a Courage attendee for a long time. It helps to overcome the addictive nature of same-sex attraction.
The inclination may be “disordered” but it need not rule every moment of your life.
When you go full force into “the life”, it becomes your primary focus of living.
Jesus is our primary focus of living. Courage helps to see yourself in the “ordered” way that Our Lord wants us to be.
Lost to apostasy or suicide, wow, that’s some threat, and holding the Catholic Church responsible is icing on the rainbow cake! Homosexualists demanding God not condemn sinful activity are full of pride, not in their bastardized meaning of the word, but pride as in one of the seven deadly sins that lead souls to hell.
If that’s the choice, then fine: risk losing them. Not my fault. Oh, I’m supposed to feel bad about that? Sorry, Eve, I’m not eating the fruit you’re offering me because I know where it came from, and I’m not going to be guilted into going against infallible moral doctrine and Scripture because you say somebody will do something harmful to himself if I don’t affirm him in his disorder or sin. You see, that’s how a man responds to such effeminate nonsense.
The battle lines are drawn you either serve God or serve Satan.
As I recall, a summary of Church teaching is ‘Love the Sinner; Hate the Sin’. These people are creatures of God.
Yes but what do you to say to a young woman who says she’s gay? I don’t want to let her think I’m ok with it or will go to a gay wedding, and don’t even think she is gay. This is since her husband cheated on her and left.
She is not “gay” as you well know by your post. Most likely she has given up on men because of the situation in which she finds herself ,and perhaps her father also cheated on her mother, which would only make her opinion of men worse. Just pray for her and tell her about her options — to remain chastely single, to get an annulment if possible, but most of all to seek God’s will for her life. Be firm that same-sex situations are not an option, and that they go against God’s plan for humanity., Do not be emotionally blackmailed by any suicide threats. The rest one must leave up to God.
The church did not just make up its teaching on sexual morality out of thin air. The church simply passes on its teaching as revealed by God. If people have a problem accepting sexual morality, don’t blame the Church, take it up with God. God desires everyone to be saved, but allows people to turn away from salvation, if they so choose.
The link does not work.
Fixed- thanks for heads up.
The Catholic Faith is misunderstood and misrepresented. Unwanted thoughts and attractions are not a sin. They become sinful when you indulge them. Unwanted behavior (?), if it is of a sexual nature, is sinful but it is not be a mortal sin without full consent of the will. It still needs to be confessed. Lust is one of the seven deadly sins. Pray for purity. Pray and work. Don’t settle for less than holiness.
Ms. Tushnet presents a false dichotomy: either we must accept homosexual acts as moral or we force homosexuals to a life of apostasy and/or suicide.
There is, of course, the Catholic way which is telling the truth that’s been handed down by Christ and continuing to minister to people who struggle with this sin. This is what the Church does for all people who sin: the sin of homosexuality is not an exception.
The means of dealing with this are varied and depend upon the individual. Such means include getting involved in a chaste support group such as Courage; psychotherapy to help alleviate the source of the attraction; and dealing with this spiritually such as breaking old habits and forming new habits.
I am glad you pointed this out. There is so much wrong in this article that I did not know where to start. Actually, though, the Catholic way of dealing with unwanted thoughts and attractions is to ignore them, get busy doing something good, read the Bible, avert your eyes, avoid the near occasions of sin, don’t put yourself in the situations that inspire these thoughts. In the words of Jennifer Marlow, “It goes away. It always does.” Do not define yourself by it.
Homosexuality, as in having your predominant attraction be to those of the same sex, is not a sin. Indulging sinful thoughts and acting sexually with anyone, including yourself, are sins.
Support groups might help. Therapy might help. Confession will help.
If you have been fighting temptation, keep up the good fight. Having fallen for temptation makes it easier to fall again. Get to confession quickly. Avoid the situation where you can fall. It is a struggle for almost everyone. God bless us all. Pray for chastity. Pray for purity.
Anonymous,
Thank you. I might add that some of the things that you mentioned can be quite difficult for some people until the techniques become a habit. Once the new habit becomes entrenched, though, it becomes quite easy and effortless. You’re correct, a timely Confession is instrumental.
In regard to homosexuality, there are often other things at play that need to be attended to as well. The idea isn’t to psychologically repress but to deal with the issues in an appropriate way. I’ve heard some very good things about a book on the subject from Fr. Benedict Groeschel entitled “The Courage to be Chaste.”
Great posts Anonymous and Steve. I think everyone has had dreams that they were appalled by when they awaken, whether of the hetero or homo variety. There is no sin in that unless the person was looking at pornography or dwelling on such things and encouraging them in their mind before hand. Most all, if not all, struggle with similar things, mostly in our younger years.
And Fr. Groeschel’s book is an excellent one. I have it on hand some place among my “multitudinous’ library of books — need to give away some of them too.
thank you for your comments Larry
you highlighted a vital distinction
between inclinations and behaviors
it seems many people gay/straight/or otherwise
are INCAPABLE of making distinctions