This story comes from an October 6 Guiding Star blog post by Leah Jacobson.
It is becoming increasingly clearer with time and research that the magic birth control Pill sold to women as the answer to all sexual inequity is merely a cancer causing, stroke starting, problem masking, and fertility decreasing mess of a “medication”. It hasn’t helped women become any more self actualized and in reality has created a strange dissonance for many modern women about how to handle and accept the natural functions of their healthy bodies.
Many women are slowly waking up and deciding that they’d rather plan their pregnancies naturally and work with their bodies instead of suppressing them. There is a slow, but steady growth of women who are insisting on following their cycles of natural fertility and using the signposts of fertility to plan their sexual encounters. That’s great, but what about the men?
The adoption of the Pill as a women’s issue placed family planning squarely into the hands of women and men were granted a pass on fertility awareness.
Men no longer had any obligation to pay attention to or honor the natural fertility of their female partner because, well, that was a woman’s issue. With the protections of birth control and abortion on demand to keep them free from all responsibilities that the consequences of their actions would naturally bring, certain men feel free to openly use women’s bodies.
These men are the result of the expectation for women to suppress their fertility. They are weak, indulgent, self-centered, and entitled. And sadly there are so many of these guys walking around now that many women don’t even know that there is a different breed; a different class of men that exists. Real MEN.
Men that are capable of learning about signposts of female fertility; things like cervical mucus, basal body temperatures, breast tenderness, etc. Men that can apply these signs to their decision making process concerning sex.
These men respect that women come with the gift of fertility. Yes, the gift. Not the burden. You see, real men can see that women are incredibly built to handle the stress and strain of carrying a new life into this world. They see female fertility as an attribute and something to be fearfully respected. They may still fear the amazing power of female fertility, but they never run from their fears. They face it head on and use their own strengths to work with their partner. And when they do they often find that the women in their lives end up feeling cherished and honored instead of manipulated and used. They experience rates of divorce that are almost unheard of and still enjoy the efficacy rate of the Pill in avoiding pregnancy.
I have been so lucky to meet many of these men. They are not as rare as most would make you believe, but they do sometimes need encouragement to develop into the men they are capable of being. They have not been told how great they can be and have been told by society that things like caring about women’s health is not their business.
So men, please do not fall for the lies that you are obsolete in the fertility discussions. Get in there and show women you are capable of being a MAN. Offer to chart her temperature every morning. Put the stickers on her chart. When you step up and honor women the way we were naturally created there is going to be a culture shift that takes place. Men and women will actually stop seeing each other as the enemy and see the contributions of one another as valuable and necessary. Women won’t feel a need to put men in their place by doing everything men can do because you will have already admitted that there is nothing greater than our ability to bear new life. You respecting us the way we naturally are will truly change the world. Because that is what real men do best.
A man who can control himself for a week is a REAL MAN.
My kind of Man.
In addition he truly loves his partner and does not want her to ingest chemicals, etc.
Men who want women to harm their bodies are very selfish, and only interested in their own pleasure.
I’d dump a guy like this in a heartbeat before marriage (if he was not willing to adhere to NFP.)
NFP or get lost. :)
One of the saddest things about “The Pill” has been the erosion of the morality of women. Many were brought up to believe — and society encouraged and enforced this view in many ways — that women incorporated the higher virtues and were fully knowledgeable about what is and is not moral, by sole reason of their birth.
When women could fornicate like sailors, without much fear of pregnancy or of “having to keep it if pregnancy occured, the succeeding years have shown their inner character to be much more base than anyone could have believed a few decades ago. Oh, certainly, here and there women are fine and wonderful, embracing a sexual dignity and belief in themselves as vessels within which to raise and nurture all future life. But, overall, women see themselves as active sexual beings early on in life, with no thought at all to living with a young man that they barely knew (and more than one).
No, women are not the Madonnas of yesterday’s belief system. And, funny thing, it has been shown that pills cause a distortion in many women in the men upon whom they choose to bestow their favor. Woman on the pill often pick more effeminate men to fornicate with, and possibly marry, leading to divorce later in life when they stop taking the pill and find themselves “normal” in the men they now admire (but are not married to). Ouch!!
I agree with the post of St. Christopher. Today’s sex-saturated culture is a DISGRACE!! Cheap sin, cheap “thrills,” (like two-year-olds at a crummy amusement park) advertised by the corrupt, money-grabbing, immoral media, like cheap fornication, drugs, alcohol, sugary, disease-causing foods, etc., for cheap, immature, shabby, sinful, filthy people, out to “grab the cheap thrills” of a totally corrupt, narcissistic, “youth ghetto” kind of society! This article focuses on sex wrongfully, as a cheap, narcissistic pleasure, mediated by NFP— rather than viewing sex properly, maturely– as one part of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony, and a big, adult responsibility! (And married couples’ sex lives, are only a small part of their overall life– about 2% of a lifetime!) Sex is, and always will be: a BIG, ADULT RESPONSIBILITY, OF MATURE MEN AND WOMEN, IN MARRIAGE!! And for Catholics, that also means, that Christ must be at the very heart and center, of all marriages!
Thank you for this article, CCD. Perhaps you have saved some lives today. Let us pray that happens. Isn’t that what Christianity is all about — saving lives?
I know because He has saved me many times in many ways. From the 1989 earthquake when the store I was in was shaking on its foundations, with everything falling off the shelves, and all I could say was, “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus,” and it was a prayer not a curse. He forced many to their knees that day and He will again.
Contraception and abortion go hand in hand. Until artificial birth control is rejected, abortion will remain as backup plan.
Read Humanae Vitae, take it’s message to heart and do not dissent. Look at the mess dissension has made for the Church and society.
It is good that the above article focuses on NFP, and the fact that men can be more manly, participating fully with their WIVES in NFP. But NFP is NOT something to ABUSE as a means of “Planned Parenthood”-style “family planning!” Let God do the planning— because in reality, He creates children and sends them, according to His Divine Will! Acceptance of God is missing, in this picture!! God is at the heart of all marriages, and He creates all pregnancies! The author needs to re-write this article, and use the terms “husband and wife,” and include the fact that God must be at the heart of all marriages, and couples must pray and ask His guidance, His Will, on all matters, including children! Remember the murderer, King Henry VIII of England?? He could not accept God’s Will, on marriage and child-bearing! Well– maybe this article will at least save some little souls, from the sin of death by birth control– or murder, by abortion!!